Did you know that one mustn’t waste time and money replacing costly contraceptives? There is any easier, less embarrassing, cost effective way to get garden fresh rubbers. Listen here, guys: Those “undesired” rank raincoats can be recycled! This can be achieved only by swishing those euphorically used uterus unibombers in one’s mouth, and not, as popular misconception holds, by putting them in the food laundry or whatever that damn fork washing machine is called.

the captain